I'm going to sit right down and write myself a letter...

I will admit to a certain fondness for the often-reviled institution known as the "Christmas Letter" - we've all gotten them -- those missives tucked into Christmas Cards that outline all the successes of the previous year -- along the lines of:

"Bob finally was made president of the golf club, which is a miracle when you consider how much time he devoted to Doctor's Without Borders this year. Of course, both our sons are also physicians, and they were able to help him when they weren't busy immunizing Somalian children and raising money for Easter Seals (Bob Jr. is chapter chairman!). And we continue to be proud of little Susie who got a scholarship to dance with the Joffrey Ballet all the while maintaining her 4.0 grade point average and lettering in lacrosse."

Now do not misunderstand - most of the letters I receive, I greatly look forward to - I enjoy hearing about what folks have been up to - particularly those I don't get to see very often.

I'm referring to the over-the-top communiques - those letters that appear to only present the brilliance, with no regard for the everyday. I once got a letter that was so pretentious it actually required a dictionary to understand.

One line stuck with me: "After years of demonstrating her exceptional engineering acumen, Beth is now at the center of our domestic tranquility, managing our household with aplomb and much self-sacrifice."

Translation: Beth got fired from her job and is now a stay-at-home Mom.

It took me almost five minutes to figure it out.

And I'm a Phi Beta Kappa who, when I'm not busy saving the world one fundraising event at a time, spends her spare time creating sculpture out of recycled materials that I find while taking underprivileged children on nature walks. Of course, this is when I have a few spare minutes between teaching English as a second language and skydiving...

Oooo...better grab my pen...I sense a letter coming on...

;-)

Where have you gone Derry Daring?

When I was a kid, it seemed like every Christmas there was the ONE gift I wanted above and beyond all others - you recall it - that feeling of "if I don't get fill-in-the-blank" life will no longer be worth living.

The year I was 10, that gift was "Derry Daring."

What? You don't remember Derry Daring?

Derry Daring was a doll, slightly smaller than Barbie, who came with her own motorcycle and leather outfit. You placed her on the bike, and the bike on a gadget that you then wound up by hand. Once released, Derry would then shoot across the room, or over a ramp that you'd set up on the coffee table.

Think Evel Knievel for girls.

I wanted Derry Daring more than anything in 1976.

1976 was probably the last year I cared about toys and Derry represented everything I wanted to be: she was original, had long blonde hair (my Mom was still making me keep my hair short at that stage of life) and most of all, Derry Daring was, well, DARING.

She was fearless! Anything the boys could do - even Evel Knievel - Derry could do - oft-time BETTER!

I can remember having pre-holiday conversations with my Dad - who, of course, had a direct line to Santa Claus:

"A motorcycle chick? Really Lolly? You wouldn't rather have a life-sized Barbie head hair salon? Or maybe a Spirograph? How about some Weebles?"

Nope - I had my heart set on Derry Daring.

And Santa must have been paying attention that year - because unlike previous years when I had requested an Easy Bake Oven and a LiteBrite - Christmas morning the full Derry Daring play set was under the tree.

Overjoyed doesn't begin to capture how excited I was.

Derry and I were best buds the rest of my 5th grade year - long after my brother got sick of his Evel Knievel playset.

I think Derry was the last actual toy I ever asked Santa to deliver. In subsequent years, I recall well wishing for and receiving such gifts as a microscope, chemistry set, roller skates (with bright orange pom-poms!) and even a Commodore 64 computer.

Clearly post-Derry, my wishes well-corresponded with the person I am today.

But for one brief shining year, I was a daredevil - jumping over stacks of Matchbox cars in the backyard, long blonde hair shimmering from under my hot-pink motorcycle helmet.

Go Derry Daring Go!

I wanna do more than whistle under the mistletoe!

Okay, I admit it - I am a Christmas Carol junkie.

I LOVE Christmas music. And I love ALL of it - from the most sacred hymns to the secular goofy songs, down to and including anything by the Muppets.

There is room on my iPod for "O Holy Night" and "Jingle Bell Rock." And I'll sing both at the top of my lungs.

But as a child, my favorite Christmas songs all came from my four album set of Lawrence Welk Christmas Classics. You see, no one told me that Lawrence Welk was for old-timers and senior citizens back then -- I thought the champagne singers were the cat's pajamas!

My favorite tune? A little ditty called "I Wanna Do More Than Whistle" - it's a keeper, with classic lyrics like:

"My jingle bell heart is beating, it's time that our lips were meeting, come give me my season's greeting...under the mistletoe!

"Start kissing and please don't tarry, 'cause kissing is customary, soon it will be January...under the mistletoe!"

Catchy, huh?

I also loved the Peggy Lee hit "Don't Forget to Feed the Reindeer" - with its winsome words:

"So don't forget to feed the reindeer

Angels are friends of the reindeer too

And if you are a good little angel

Santa Claus will be good to you!"

Either one of these songs can instantly transport me back to my Dad's den, circa 1979, with the albums playing on the big stereo...

A few years ago, my sister found the Lawrence Welk albums on Ebay and gave them to me for Christmas - I almost cried I was so happy!

It was all there -- Guy, Ralna, Towering Tom Netherton, Mary Lou, even the Champagne Lady herself, Norma Zimmer, singing "Ave Maria."

One of the very best parts of the holiday season is reliving old memories and creating new ones - I can hardly wait to see what new memories will be added to the Christmas arsenal this year!

And now, if you'll excuse me, my husband's out of the house this evening and I'm going to fire up the ole phonograph...

Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens...

Last year I wrote a silly "Favorite Things" blog entry, based on Oprah's annual show - where unsuspecting members of her studio audience received all kinds of glorious stuff...I wasn't going to do it again this year, but have had several emails from friends and family members requesting a new list, so here goes:

Lolly's Favorite Things - 2009 Edition

1. GLEE - I've loved watching the new Fox TV Show Glee since its first airing - the marriage of high school angst with musical theatre! My favorite Glee moment wasn't actually from the show itself...it was me asking my friend Kevin why he thought they portrayed the Glee Club kids as such misfits? After all, I was like that in HS, and I wasn't a geek...right? Kevin just looked at me and said, "Oh Laura..."

2. I've often said that BACON is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy, and 2009 was definitely the year I rediscovered bacon. From the Baconator at Wendy's to my obsession with the mere concept of chicken fried bacon to my discovery of Bacon Salt - it's all about the bacon. Which leads neatly into #3:

3. In October I began exercising regularly again (all that bacon!), and have taken up KICKBOXING - what a great cardio workout - not to mention a way to work out all of my frustration. And after accidentally kicking a fellow classmate on the first day, I am pleased to report that I've not injured anyone else - myself included!

4. What was I waiting for? In January 2009, we finally got high speed wireless internet here at Stately Stocker Manor...how in the world did we survive before we could carry our laptops from room to room? Many is the night you'll find both hubby and me both watching TV with laptops a-whirling...

5. Mr. Clean Magic Eraser - this little white sponge can clean up almost anything -- where have you been hiding all my life Mr. Clean? It takes marks off white walls, scuz and scum off the floors and shower walls, and bird scat off white pick-up trucks. Amazing!

6. Cecil Whitaker's Pizza - my first trip to St. Louis and my first exposure to this incredible ultra-flat pizza with Pravel cheese. Utterly delicious - can't wait to go back and eat more! A close second place to a restaurant chain called Steak n Shake - none in Central PA - but best milkshakes I've ever had - half chocolate, half vanilla! Plus they give you a really cool diner-style hat to wear!

7. Favorite Song of 2009 - "Take A Bow" as sung by Lea Michele in Glee:

"You put on quite a show, really had me going

Now it's time to go, curtain's finally closing..."

Of course I first heard this song moments after being told that my services would no longer be required at the company I'd helped found ten years earlier...

8. Kristin Chenowith - this pint-sized dynamo (who is probably sick to death of being called a pint-sized dynamo!) starred in my favorite now-defunct show "Pushing Daisies" - and made a hysterical guest appearance on Glee - singing my second favorite song of the year: "Alone" - originally made famous by Heart. Loved her new Christmas album and her autobiography published this year. The uber-talented Ms. Chenowith makes me want to be a better singer...a better writer...and a better Christian!

9. How in the world did I get to age 41 without having seen an IMAX movie? Went to my first IMAX 3-D movie this year - WHOA! I'm now ruined for other movie theatres -- the scope, the sound, the funny glasses!

10. Virginia Diner Peanuts - I've always been a lover of the nut, but these peanuts from Virginia are truly outstanding - and each is roughly the size of my pinky finger! These peanuts are like my own personal brand of crack - they are that good!

11. Biggest thrill of the year - riding the Superman roller coaster with my buddy Elliott at Great Adventure! BEST roller coaster EVER - and I'm not just saying that because it is modeled after my all time favorite superhero. You ride face down (and if you're like me, arms extended) and it really feels like you are flying! Unbelievable rush - can't wait to return next summer and try it again!

And it goes without saying that I continue to be loved and supported by friends and family - without whom the silly stuff mentioned above wouldn't have nearly as much meaning!

Cheers!